Recant

I find myself taking my laptop with me wherever I go; not because I'm a computer fanatic, but because of Twitter. Yes...Twitter. I started off hating it (check my first blog),but now? Well, those gosh darn trending topics have pulled me in! In my heart I still know it's a stupid concept. I still can't picture the proposal for the site, "hey, I have this idea where you just tell people random nothings about your boring life in 140 characters or less. Whaddya think?" Then, some random lunatic replies "yeah, that sounds like a GREAT idea!" If they only knew. In any case, I'm recanting my Twitter hate. I have [not so]proudly fallen victim to the latest social networking craze and I figured I'd publicly make my apology. I'm sorry, Twitter. You're clearly a great site and are #FTW! That is all.

Tis the season!

Just kidding! I'm much more of a "Bah Humbug!" kinda guy. I don't celebrate Christmas *the crowd gasps then chaos ensues* ,but in the spirit of the holiday season I figured it only right that I write a Christmas blog! Now, now...don't expect a bunch of hibbidy hooblah about how much I hate this holiday(even though I kinda do). I just think it's a lil funny (just a teeny bit) that most people have no clue what the season is about/how it started! That, for me, is one on of those "c'mon son" moments. How the hell are you not gonna know about the things you participate in? C'mon son. Get the fuck outta here with that bullshit! But no, that's not my biggest frustration. I'd have to say my biggest frustration with Christmas is all those got damned texts! I woke up to a myriad of texts and IMs talking about "Merry Christmas!" What oh what am I to do? I guess that's where I'm supposed to say "awwwww that's nice!" Don't get me wrong, I like texts. I like IMs. I like hearing from people. I just don't like having to wish people a merry Christmas when I don't celebrate it. "Well why don't ya just say thanks and keep it moving?" Because I think it's a bit rude to rain on someone's holiday parade. It's like someone saying sorry to you and you're all like "You're got damn right you're sorry!" It's just cruel! And in all my black-heartedness I'll not go and shit on someone's holiday cheer when all they're trying to do is share it with me. Eventually, I just gave up on the hope of imparting to everyone the fact that I DON'T FREAKIN' CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS. Yes. I caved and started wishing it back. I figured it's a lot easier that way and in the end, I'll have less hair in my hands and more on my head. So, to all of you on this "happy,happy, joy, joy" of a day, BAH HUM--err, Merry Christmas! *smiley face*

Not approved by the FDA

There's no sense in beating around the bush with this one. I think this is hilarious! But really, am I wrong for finding some humor in this video? Granted, I don't, won't, and can't agree with everything in this video, but from the stance of "there's niggers and then there's black people" I can certainly see how such a medication might be a tiny bit useful. For example, liking chicken is not a "nigger" thing. Dave Chappelle said it best, "there's not something wrong with me for liking chicken. If you don't like chicken, there's something wrong with YOU!" So thanks,but no thanks,Niggarette. I don't need anything curing my love for KFC! What else was there? Ah yes, adding water to milk! If you do that out of sheer laziness you deserve to be shot. That's just disgusting. Eat the cereal dry for Pete's sake! It's not that bad. Really. I do it all the time! What I did get from this satirical vid, in light of recent events, is that some of these got damn celebs could use this! Gilbert Arenas...#cmonson. What type of special idiot are you?! I never understood why people blessed with beaucoup amounts of money occasionally feel the need to fuck up like the regular, got-nothing-to-lose, poor people. If he gets locked up and anally raped(as per Tom Dubois' penitentiary beliefs) he deserves it! Well...maybe not that last part. No man deserves that, but definitely the jail time! You're rich, damnit! You have no business doing dumb nigger shit like that! Usually, I'm very against strict punishment of black public figures, as they already have so many things and people against them. However, I grow tired of hearing about the down right foolish things that they get into. I mean, some of this shit you couldn't cook up in a fairy tale! Don't look for supporting examples on that 'cause I have none lol. In any case, I say give Arenas a Niggerette and put him back on the court!

Agent Double Oh No!

In the spirit of all the sneaky things in the news lately, I've decided I'd join in on the fun surrounding the secret agent spy couple that somehow managed to sneak in the White House and of course, Tiger Woods. Now, before I go on, I must say how interesting it is that Sir Tiger of Woods's philandering is receiving far more press than the epic security breach (because that's what it was) of the White House. Now that that's out the way, onto the good stuff! Tiger frickin Woods... not so squeaky clean now are ya? How hilarious is it that he was sneaking around and thought everything was cool until he had that "Uh-oh" moment w/ a side of 9 iron to the windshield? Then the voicemail leaks requesting a name change on his side chick's greeting. Ha! Now THAT'S some true-to-life pimp shit. Tiger has control of all his hizzoes! Who'da thought? But seriously, he's a billionaire. If I make that type of money, I might feel inclined to do what the hell I want,too. That doesn't make it right, but hey, it is what it is! All in all, he's definitely an Agent Double Oh No for his sloppy cheating. Get it together, Tiger! In other news, what in the hell is going on in America why this couple was able to do what they did? I know, I know, they intended no harm (so they say), but noxious intentions or not, they had no business being there! Hell, I'm always up for some free food and beverage,but you don't see me crashing shit now, do ya? Then comes the icing on this cake of foolishness...they're trying to get a reality show. Honestly, there's no other way I can express my sentiments other than to quote Ed lover and say "c'mon son!" TV is going down the tube in America, and fast! In conclusion, the now infamous couple definitely gets the title of Agent Double Oh No for their failed attempt at getting free food. All in all, it just goes to show you how right Eddie Murphy was in his skit. If you have the right color, things are a hellova lot easier for ya!

Bad ambition?No ambition?No problem!

I'll get right to the title, as I'm sure you're wondering what the hell it's about. I pose to you, good readers of my blog, this question: Is it right to leave someone for having no ambition? My thoughts on it? Yes. But lets not make any hasty decisions just yet. Lets think about this for a sec. How much does your partner's goals (or the lack thereof) play a part in your life? I mean, if you're going to make it (whatever "it" may be) and you're going places in life is your success really contingent upon the path your partner takes? Truth be told, if you're really about your business then no; your success in life is definitely determined by you and only you. So what is the big hang-up about having goals in life and ACTUALLY trying to achieve them? Well, I like to think in terms of networking events (a particularly strange thing since I'm not exactly the networking type). If I'm somewhere and I'm asked what I do, my response will be "." Now, if the person then asks what does my significant other do (be it a wife, girlfriend or just the chick I'm putting the pipe to that makes for a good date every now and then), I shouldn't have to have that befuddled look on my face that if it were interpreted into words, it'd be something like "oh shit! Uhhh..." How about the simple fact that two people should be on the same page? I don't know of anyone who is all for the idea of one person working hard and the other hardly working. If I'm going through the struggle on the long road to progress then damnit, you should be there with me and I, with you! As a black man, as a man, as a citizen of a capitalist nation, and as a denizen of money makin' NY, I cannot afford to not be complacent. I say all that to say this: Always strive for more,folks. Be a goal digger; not a gold digger *(c)C.Maree* If you opt not to, you're not alone. Grab a seat on your nearest couch and find solace in the fact that you get a complimentary mug.